A Tortured Journey

For many of us,
This endless journey can be tortuous
Despair, vulnerability,
Loss of the old self and of mobility,

Notice the visible walking wounded;
But I am wounded walking
Some learn to walk straight but how do I think straight
I cannot

A hidden disability
Difficult for anyone to see
A disappointment that all focus on loss of limbs,
The external obvious

To some of us
The impact is just as damaging
An internal amputation
With a misunderstood complexity

I am angry at a sense that no one cares
Why should anyone else be aware?
These injuries cannot be seen and therefore I am not:
Deserving of your interest?

Forced to accept a different me
Not a physical difference but an almost absolute anomaly
So very hard

From an afghan conflict to my own internal one
Two sides to a dysfunctional brain and never the twain
Shall they meet?

My old one, the one I know so well
Challenged by the new and different half
For better and worse
A marriage of inconvenience

Heart and head in conflict
Disconnect and friction with how I think
Descartes is wrong; I think but I am not;
Wired the way I know

A lack of understanding amongst many
Even those who care
The only people that I can share my frustrations with
Those who know:
The injured.